1. “I promise you, the President has a big stick.”
This quote, made on the campaign trail in 2012, was in reference to the Obama Administration’s emulating of President Theodore Roosevelt‘s “speak softly and carry a big stick” foreign policy. Thankfully, President Obama has not yet had to brandish his “big stick” in negotiations, though we’re not sure how effective it would be.
2. “Folks, I can tell you I’ve known eight Presidents, three of them intimately.”
Also said during the 2012 election season, Biden reveals how much of a “close friend” he can be to his fellow politicians. We can guess that the Vice President would be a rather generous acquaintance, but we’re not sure whether we’d want to get to know him on an “intimate” level.
3. “I’d rather be at home making love to my wife while my children are asleep.”
In his unsuccessful 2008 presidential campaign, Biden made it clear where his priorities are. It’s not politics that is his greatest passion, but rather, sneakily making sweet love to his wife. We can assume that the current policy at Number One Observatory Circle is to knock on the bedroom door before entering.
4. “I’ve been sleeping with a teacher for a long time. But it’s always been the same teacher.”
In 2010, the Vice President said this quote in front of a National Teacher of the Year reception, showing just how much love he has for the profession. Dr. Jill Biden has been teaching for decades, and she has been a professor of English at Northern Virginia Community College since 2009. Perhaps Vice President Biden made the statement because he has a case of being “Hot for Teacher.”
5. “I cannot believe that a Frenchman visiting Kiev went back home and told his colleagues he discovered something and didn’t say he discovered the most beautiful women in the world. That’s my observation.”
Biden was speaking at a pub in 2009 with then-Ukrainian President Viktor Yushchenko when he made this exclamation. As Yushchenko wished to discuss the churches in his home country, Biden’s mind wandered to another topic. We wonder if Biden had then-Prime Minister Yulia Tymoshenko on his mind.
6. “There’s a gigantic difference between John McCain and Barack Obama, and between me and I suspect my vice presidential opponent. … She’s good-looking.”
You won’t get any disagreement from us there, Joe. It’s worth noting that if the parties were switched in the context of this quote from late in the 2008 campaign, the odds of Biden’s statement coming back to bite him would’ve likely been much greater. Nonetheless, he was just saying what we were all thinking.
7. “Neal Smith, an old butt buddy. Are you here, Neal? Neal, I miss you, man. I miss you.”
It’s not just women who get the gift of Biden. In a trip to Iowa in anticipation of a possible 2016 presidential campaign, Biden expanded upon just how “intimate” he can get with his political friends. Further, Biden shows the depth of his heart, explaining how much he’s missed his “very good” friend.
8. “As they say in southern Delaware, ‘Boy, you married up.'”
This quote spoken to Maine Senator Susan Collins‘s husband shows how much he appreciates the beauty of the females representing our country in Washington. While we did not consult Vice President Biden for our list, we can assume that he would have his own input.
9. “As they say in my business, I’m gonna give you the whole load today.”
Oh my, Vice President Biden. While we’re not at all sure what he was discussing during this 2012 campaign stop, we appreciate the generosity in his willingness to not hold back. We also wonder exactly what “business” he participates in that uses such a slogan, but either way, we now know that Joe is the “giving” type.
10. “I tell you what, having been a receiver, I like a softer ball. That’s all I can tell you.”
We never knew the Vice President had such specific preferences in the kinds of balls he played with in football, but it all came to light when he was asked about the infamous NFL “deflate-gate” scandal earlier this year. As it turns out, Biden is a sensitive kind of guy, and when he’s on the receiving end, he prefers it to be soft. We can only assume his football style translates over to his well-documented love-life.