The Ex Girlfriend Political Spectrum Guide

Socialist Sally

“If you don’t buy all my meals I’ll sue you for psychological abuse and have the state force you too!”

Socialist Sally and you fell hard and fast for each other, but before you could say “take it slow,” you adopted a cat, had a shared checking account, bought a house (under your name), and took out a loan so she could get a new sports car. You wanted to think things are cool, but before you realized you were drowning in debt. She comes home one day and says she quite her job because she felt like it and she thinks she is pregnant because you didn’t buy contraceptives, and she wants you to take care of her because she’s now an unemployed, possibly unwed mother. If you refuse to take care of her every whim she will fake domestic abuse and have the cops drag you to court until she has every penny you have so she can move onto the next dude.  Socialist Sally leaves you bankrupt, but there is a silver lining to this bad break up…