So you want a libertarian boyfriend?
By Charlotte Mecklenburg
Ladies, ladies, ladies. I have seen many lists and videos about what libertarian men should do to get a liberty loving gal. Now it’s your turn to put yourself in order.
1.) Don’t be a libertarian social media butterfly
Your social media persona may just be that. However, you are telling the world something about yourself. Even if it is nothing more than I don’t have life beyond sharing the latest outrage. If you don’t have a job that requires you to be on-line for liberty, then don’t. Having an air of mystery gives a man something to long for. It also indicates that you might be a competent functional adult with a job. Normal well-adjusted men tend to seek the same. Men like doers, not screamers (except maybe in bed.)
2.) Take No for an Answer
Independent women have every right to make a pass at a man. They also know how to accept rejection gracefully. First, the numbers are in your favor. It’s a man buffet. If this one is not interested, the next one will be. Secondly, the libertarian world is still a small one. If the man you were seeking was polite (but firm) in his rejection, he still might be a future ally, coworker or even (gasp) a friend.
If a guy is leading you on, recognize that like a rational person instead of a chump. Laugh it off and move on. A guy too indecisive or who runs hot and blows cold… might as well be a teenage girl.
3.) Don’t be the Jerky Guy, Girlfriend
Don’t be tease. A lot of libertarian men aren’t so much awkward as they are isolated because they don’t easily find women who share their politics. Don’t be the person that makes someone else a bitter mess. If man is a good guy but doesn’t blow your hair back, woman up, put your ovaries on the table and say so in a reasonable but clear way. Do it now. Not later. Propaganda to the contrary, men have feelings. In some theologies, they even have souls.
4.) Men are human beings
Treat them as individuals. They aren’t a collective. Libertarian men are human beings with individual tastes. Each one has goals, dreams, and dignity. Each one also likes something different. While there is plenty of misandrist nonsense about how men are dogs who only like Victoria Secret’s models, in reality, men date women of all ages, body types and styles. Some of them even like women for their minds. Give them the benefit of their humanity by assuming they are just as thoughtful and complex as you are in their romantic desires.
5.) Be a Dream; Not a Damsel in Distress
If your Facebook page is a series of constant job changes (you know, you get fired a lot), non-stop drama, and bad break ups, you aren’t good girlfriend material. Contrary to dude bro blogs, most men are frightened by women who are “handfuls.” They also find girls who can’t keep (platonic) girlfriends potential problems. “If she treats her friends that way, how is she going to treat me?”
Guys might fall in love with the drama queen but they won’t stick around for long. Most adults who are doing something with their lives have limited capacity for crazy. As previously noted, the libertarian world is a small one. Don’t get a rep for being that girl.
And while we are on that subject…
6.) Be Discreet
Very few people want to see their sex lives featured on a Liberty.me blog or the subject of Liberty Radio Network’s Rebel Love. Comparing penis sizes with “Eskimo Sisters” or indulging in ladies’ room talk is disrespectful and often just plain mean. What’s the purpose? To humiliate? To show off? To show everyone you can get some? You are a woman. Of course, you can get action.
Double this rule if you want a libertarian job. Your image is everything in politics. If your last Instagram is an “after sex” photo, you are opening yourself up to sexual harassment from creepertarians. If you want to be respected, be respectable.
7.) Avoid Libertarian U-haul Syndrome
Heterosexual libertarians make lesbians seem like commitment phobes. Ladies who fancy ladies know of which I speak. You met a few weeks ago at ISFLC. Now you have changed your Facebook status to “In a Relationship [Mr. Right Now].” Your official head shot is the two of you in a photo booth with your tongue is his ear. You are breaking your lease because you are both moving in together to a mini house in New Hampshire.
Now, you are going to do this anyway because your vagina has a mind of its own. Stop and think how this appears to others (like employers) including future more serious suitors. First, if you are under 30 the chances of a sudden very public romance lasting for more than a year or two is as a good as Rand Paul becoming president. Sorry, peeps but its true. Second, you are inviting everyone into your bedroom when you make a spectacle of yourself. Inevitably when you break up, you are in effect asking for public comment if you make yourself intertwined in the interwebs.
If you need for everyone to know you have a boyfriend, you aren’t mature enough to have one.
8.) Don’t be a Cheater
Own up, ladies. We know our fair sex does it too. Find the aforementioned ovaries and break up with your current steady before you start bedding someone else. Two timing is cruel, immature, and tells people that you don’t respect your word.
Finally…
9.) You can’t turn a Peter Keating into a Howard Roark
You also can’t turn basket case into prize. Libertarians, more so than other humans, have a long list of eccentricities. Honestly look at your potential honey. You may adore his propensity for civil disobedience but bailing someone out of jail every weekend can put a cramp in your style. You may respect the heck out of his rocked ribbed atheism but Richard Dawkins isn’t known for his sense of humor.
Women like fixer upper projects and libertarian women are no exception. Libertarian men do happen to be smarter than the average guy but smart guys often have a lot of emotional baggage, odd ball interests and Asperger’s. His adorable take on fractals and fluoride will eventually become annoying once the sexual tension is resolved. Accept him as he will be when the romance fades or let him go.