Some Halloween Costumes Fit Candidates Perfectly
Complete with sweets, costumes and parties, Halloween is one of the most festive times of the year. Just because the 2016 Presidential candidates are busy campaigning, they can surely still find time to don a disguise and participate in this holiday. Here are a few suggestions for costumes that would fit some of the top candidates.
Rand Paul: Ghost
Dressing as a ghost is a great idea for Rand Paul, as it perfectly encapsulates the way he has been treated by the news media thus far in the campaign. He has been left off polls when they’ve been displayed on television, and most recently, was all but silenced during the CNBC debate. In addition, the costume is consistent with the false notion that his campaign is “dead,” even though he appears to have found plenty of life after death. As the field narrows, Paul will have more attention directed his way, but for the moment, he would make a perfect ghost.
Hillary Clinton: Chameleon
Hillary Clinton has never hesitated to change her political “colors” when necessary, and what little campaigning she has done thus far has proven this even more. Polls seem often to dictate the positions that Clinton takes, and if she’s too unsure, she will simply not take a position at all. In addition, she has attempted to portray herself as an “every-person,” even as she is mired in scandal and believed to be completely out-of-touch. Clinton wants nothing more than to try to “blend into” mainstream America, so this chameleon costume is wholly fitting.
Ted Cruz: “Two-Face” Harvey Dent
Besides his “two-faced” attempts to pander to both libertarians and more “traditional” Republicans, Ted Cruz has plenty in common with this iconic Batman character. As the quote in the Dark Knight goes, “You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.” During his 2012 Senate election, Cruz was endorsed by both Ron and Rand Paul, and was considered to be another possible libertarian voice in the upper chamber. However, he has since devolved into not much more than a typical politician, particularly since beginning his run for President.
Bernie Sanders: Sheep Dog
Sheep dogs are trained to herd sheep on their respective farms. Bernie Sanders insists that he’s a threat to the status quo of the Democratic Party, but he has a much more cordial relationship with party leadership than one might originally believe. Each time when he has run for the Senate in Vermont, he has participated in the general election without Democratic opposition. His unwillingness to attack Hillary Clinton thus far seems to suggest he is content with finishing in second place in the Presidential primary and then warmly endorsing his opponent.
Jeb Bush: Medieval King
The Bush family has had a presence on the Republican Presidential ticket in six of the last nine elections. There is not supposed to be an oligarchical power structure in the United States, but Jeb Bush seems to want to make it so. To have three Presidents of the same family in less than thirty years would be the closest to ascendancy by bloodline that our Republic has ever seen. His campaign has been floundering in recent weeks, but many in the media and on Wall Street express a desire to see the same family in power once again.
Marco Rubio: Policeman
This costume not only exemplifies Rubio’s desire to continue policing Americans’ personal lives with programs like the War on Drugs, but also his apparent inclination for the United States to be the “policeman of the world.” Rubio seems to never find a war he isn’t ready to fight, infamously stating earlier this year that he is against “nation building” in Iraq but wants to help them in “building their nation.” He has also stated that he would not follow the Iran Nuclear deal should he become President and that he desires to enforce a no-fly zone in Syria.
Donald Trump: Clown
Clowns can be amusing and can provide a solid source of entertainment. However, their routine can become old if they hang around too long. Such is the candidacy of Donald Trump. Early on, his grandiose and completely impractical ideas of a giant wall and “making America great again” were worth a snicker. However, as it becomes more apparent that he has no solid policy proposals, his time seems to be running out. Just as the crowd around the clown begins to thin as his balloon animal tricks wear thin, voters are beginning to look elsewhere.
Ben Carson: Gilligan
The title character of the 1960s sitcom Gilligan’s Island, Gilligan found himself stranded on a deserted island through no fault of his own. An easily likable character, his intentions weren’t bad, it was just that he was extremely out of his element. He came up with some good ideas and many bad ones, but nonetheless, he had a good heart, and no one could stay mad at Gilligan. Carson finds himself in the 2016 race due to a whirlwind of anti-establishment fervor. Though he at times espouses wise thoughts, it more often becomes clear that he should stick to neurosurgery.
Mike Huckabee: Lounge Singer
Many lounge singers have had interesting lives. At their peaks, they drew millions of listeners and made lots of money. However, as years went on, their acts got old or they just weren’t able to keep up with the industry. Either way, they have gone from headlining sold-out arenas to singing a few songs at the local bar’s happy hour just to make ends meet. After all, performing is the only life they’ve ever known. Mike Huckabee is in a similar predicament. The country has passed him by, but giving stump speeches on social conservatism is all that keeps him going.
Carly Fiorina: Secret Agent
It can be hard to tell who are friends and enemies in the spy world. Those who have pledged allegiance to you can end up stabbing you in the back when you least expect it, thus exposing themselves as moles for the opposition side. Carly Fiorina has unexpectedly broken onto the scene in the 2016 Presidential Election, portraying herself as an outsider and opponent of the establishment. However, far less discussed is her long record within the Republican Party infrastructure, including time working on the John McCain campaign. The GOP grassroots should be wary.